


Nothing Common About Us

by howtogetawaywithprocrastination



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: AU, M/M, Pranks, Prison, Reckless Jace, egging houses
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-18
Updated: 2018-12-18
Packaged: 2019-09-22 08:20:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,310
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17056235
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/howtogetawaywithprocrastination/pseuds/howtogetawaywithprocrastination
Summary: Simon is trying to be mature about a break up and goes to talk to his ex when he sees Jace egging said ex's house.





	Nothing Common About Us

**Author's Note:**

> So, I saw an online prompt sometime ago that was "I’m egging a random person’s house to relieve stress and you join me and as it turns out the house belongs to your ex and now they are chasing us as well as the police and now we’re both in jail waiting to be bailed so um you wanna talk about it?". (credits: http://dailyau.tumblr.com/post/167805843407/im-egging-a-random-persons-house-to-relieve)
> 
> I obviously connected it to Jimon, so, this happened.

Simon was going to talk with James. He was a mature adult now that he was twenty one years old and he was capable enough of going to his ex’s house to talk about their break up and how much he needed closure to move on. At least that was what he thought his night was going to be, until he actually got to James’ house.

What he saw when he got there was a blond guy who was, apparently, throwing eggs at the house.

“Um... What do you think you’re doing, dude?” Simon asked in a bold, if somewhat awkward, way.

The blond froze for a second and slowly turned to look at Simon. “I... Well. Is this your house?” He asked with a raised eyebrow.

“No. It’s my ex’s, actually.”

“Really? Oh, good! Then take some of this and help me.”

And that’s the story of how Simon found himself with a armful of eggs and decided to just don’t care and started to egg James’ house with the random stranger.

 

 

Not even ten minutes after that, the both of them heard Simon’s ex yelling that he had called the police and so they ran. Unfortunately, they still got caught because Simon tripped on the way and the other guy cursed and tried to help him up. And that’s how the both of them got caught by an officer and got brought to the station they currently were, waiting for someone to come and bail them out.

 

 

“So... this is awkward...” Simon decided to broke the silence that had fall upon them, even though they were not even sitting in the cell for a full twenty minutes.

“Oh, you think?” The blond guy snorted and ended up laughing.

“Well, it’s my fault that we got caught so, for that, I apologise.”

“Don’t worry, I was the one who got you in this mess in the first place.”

“Yeah, about that... Why were you throwing eggs at James’?”

“That’s his name then?” Simon didn’t answered him. “You see, I was pissed off and stressed because it’s the end of the semester and I just thought... why not egg someone’s house? And well, you know the rest.” He finished off with a smirk.

“So it’s a common thing for you to do?”

“Nah, dude. My brother would kill me. Well... he will, anyway, since he is the one I called to bail me out. But yeah, not really my scene. I just... needed it.”

“You are really weird, I hope you know that.”

“You’re actually the first person to ever tell me that.”

And silence ensued.

“What has he done?” The blond asked, trying to be nonchalant but not quite getting it right.

“Who?” Simon asked confused.

“James.”

“What makes you think he did something?” Simon asked, a little uncomfortable because he was not really used to talk about his personal life with random people.

“Well, you said he was your ex and you didn’t seem to have a problem joining me.”

“Ah... I was actually going there to have a talk with him. We broke up two weeks ago and he has been avoiding me and I need closure. We are both grow ups, yet, he acts like a child and instead of talking it out, he’s been sending his friends to send me messages from him. I’m just fed up.”

“Yeah... But why did you guys really broke up?” The guy turned on his seat to have a better look on Simon.

“I... He said that he couldn’t cope with the fact that I am a geek.” Was the weak answer that Simon gave.

“I’m sorry... what?”

“Like... I love Star Wars and other geeky things?”

“I’m still not following.”

“You don’t know what Star Wars is?” Simon was scandalized now. One thing was to not have watched the films or not liking it - he could even handle that - but never heard about it?

“No, I know that. I’m just not following the line of thought. What’s wrong with that? And anyway, it’s more than obvious that you are a dork. He couldn’t be dumb enough to not notice it?” The blond was looking like he was personally offended by James.

“He knew, he just wasn’t expecting me to really be into my stuff, I guess. So, we were at mine and he saw my action figures and out of the blue, when I went to take a shower, he just noped the fuck out. Then his friends started to come and tell me. At least they looked like they felt awful about having to be the messengers.”

“Well, now I have zero regrets for egging his house in particular. What a moron.”

“You think?”

“I mean, he his the one who clearly lost, right? You are cute; you know how to have a conversation, even though you are a dork, which, kudos, and you know how to have fun!” The blond enumerated with the aid of his fingers.

“Trust me... I’m not one to do this kind of thing spontaneously.”

“Alright. Yet, you just followed my lead and we both had fun, right?” The guy smiled, looking like a happy child and Simon just melted.

“Yeah... I’m Simon, by the way.”

“Well, Simon the Dork, I’m Jace.”

“As in Jace the Almighty House Eggster?”

“Precisely!” And Jace winked at Simon.

And in that precise moment, an officer started to open their cell.

“Well, boys, you are free to go. Luckily for you, Mr. Smith decided to not press charges. Anyway, there’s some people here to take you home. Just try and behave yourselves so I don’t have to chase you again.” The man smiled, even though he was trying to be stern.

“Thank you, officer.” They both said in chorus and smiled at each other.

Outside Simon saw Clary waiting for him while shaking her head and next to her were two guys, a tall one with black hair and an Asian one with a really cool hair and make up.

“Really, Jace?” The black haired guy asked with narrowed eyes.

“Why, hello to you too, Alec! Magnus, what lovely surprise!” The blond said cheekily.

“What on earth, Simon?” Clary asked full of reprimand on her voice.

“It was Jace’s fault, to be honest.” Simon said immediately, raising both his palms, as if in surrender.

“Hey!” Simon heard Jace’s protest at the same time the tall guy, Alec, said: “Of course, why am I not even surprised?”.

“You really liked it, Dork, so don’t throw me under the bus.” Jace said with an eye roll.

“Let’s just go, Jace.” Alec urged.

“Yeah, yeah... Just give me a sec.” Jace walked to Simon and grabbed the brunet’s phone. “There. Call me when you are done messing around with little boys and feel like hanging out with us real men.” He said mock seriously, giving Simon’s phone back, and walked to the door, to everyone’s surprise.

“Well... That’s a first.” Magnus said with a smirk, eyeing Simon up and down.

“Let’s just go, before I feel like slapping myself into a coma as to not deal with Jace’s antics anymore...” Alec grunted and grabbed Magnus hand to get out the precinct.

“What... What has just happened?” Simon asked no one in particular.

“I don’t know but I feel like you found your next boyfriend, if that blond guy can get a word on the matter.” Clary said, trying to hide a smirk.

“How is this my life, really, Fray? Let’s just go home, please.”

“Alright, captain!” She laughed and guided him outside by his arm.

Secretly, Simon was smiling to himself and thinking if texting Jace that same night would seem bad or not.

Well... If he did text him that night it would hardly be his fault. Jace was the one that gave him his number, after all.

**Author's Note:**

> Not a great work but there you go. Let me know if you liked it, anyway! :)


End file.
